Friday, May 8, 2009

Mothers Day

In the month of May each year 2 things happen. It is Mothers day, and it is my late Mothers birthday. On Mothers day I still cry because I can’t pick up the phone and just call her, and on her birthday it is worse. I see allot of her in myself these days, managing a 4 year old and keeping things together. Some times I pause and know exactly how she felt when she told me not to do a certain thing. I know now that love and discipline walks hand in hand. She shouted at us when we got hurt because she cared for us, and all the “I told you so’s” was because she loved us and did not want us to get hurt.

I miss her. Her voice still echoes in my ears. In the beginning I was scared that the image in my mind I have of her would fade, but it never did. Maybe we are scared that we will forget when people die. But the truth is, they all leave something behind in order for us to remember them, whether it is something they did or said, that will stay with us for the rest of our lives. They have an impact and they do not know, you don’t realize it until they are gone. You try and remember the little things, all the detail, all the days spent in their presence.

I can tell you many stories about my mother. She loved me with all her heart.

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